IconElegies

My world began to change into something that I no longer felt was my own. Life began to be a slow descent into darkness. I decided to end it while the joy was still somehow present, and I still felt the most important things. No. They weren't the comedian's tears but something else. I couldn't catch them. A poet's note. The actor Robin Williams committed suicide.

I became famous by hurting myself. My last stunt was my last, and I didn't pull it off. And it wasn't shown on TV. The Porsche stunt was a drunken thing, which I could no longer forgive. The car, the guy, and I were left on that road. Life was fun while it lasted. I didn't think  I was going to die in a nursing home, but it can hurt in heaven too. Poet's Note. Ryan Dunn was a member of the Jackass group and died in a car accident.

My name was John Holmes. I fucked thousands of women, sometimes for money. I certainly didn't live in Wonderland. John Holmes wasn't my real name, of course. I was known for my big cock, I was the king of porn, a high school dropout, and I had the biggest dick in the business. Everything is bigger in America. I wasn't a good person, I was addicted to cocaine, violent, a criminal. I was unhappy and it destroyed me. Poet's Note. John Holmes is still one of the most famous porn actors.

I was named after an Indian rebel, but my war was not fought in the Andes but in the streets, which were my destiny. My death did not free my people from oppression, because the oppressed shot me. Why on earth? Most people don't even know who I was named after, and why they shoot each other. Poet's Note. Tupac Shakur was an American rapper, poet, and actor.

I couldn't sleep. I just couldn't. You can be the best actor in the world but you can't act your own life. Like the Joker, who laughs when forced. There are always new stars. New Jokers. I sleep. Forever. Poett´s note. Actor Heath Ledger died  of a comabination of sleeping pills.

 It was supposed to be the last time. The last time I used. The last time I had to forget. The last time I had to be forgotten. It was the last time. So many times I had looked death eye to eye. Now it took me. Almost by accident. I knew it would, but I was almost surprised. I was Matthew Perry. I made others laugh, even as I cried.  Poets note. Everybody remembers Matthew from Friends.